Tech Support Again

This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Help line which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause."

Actual dialogue of a former Word Perfect Customer Support employee (now I know why they record these conversations!)

T: "Ridge Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"

C: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

T: "What sort of trouble?"

C: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

T: "Went away?"

C: "They disappeared."

T: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

C: "Nothing."

T: "Nothing?"

C: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

T: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

C: "How do I tell?"

T: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

C: "What's a sea-prompt?"

T: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"

C: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

T: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

C: "What's a monitor?

T: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

C: "I don't know."

T: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

C: "Yes, I think so."

T: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

C: "Yes, it is."

T: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

C: "No."

T: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

C: "Okay, here it is."

T: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

C: "I can't reach."

T: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

C: "No."

T: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

C: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."

T: "Dark?"

C: "Yes -the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

T: "Well, turn on the office light then."

C: "I can't."

T: "No? Why not?"

C: "Because there's a power failure."

T: "A power... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

C: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

T: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

C: "Really? Is it that bad?"

T: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."

C: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

T: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."